Congratulations to Mazen Edlibi, winner of our Inspirational Journeys stories. His story is a highly emotive and engaging narrative of how he experienced great personal transformation through coaching.
Mazen’s entry was a highly insightful and candid narrative of how he found meaning to his life, despite overcoming many painful and challenging obstacles along the way.
As he explains, “Although it was rough and tough journey, shaken and uncertain as well as painful however still worthy. At some point of time, where I was so close to giving up on pursuing this goal, there was “Hope” somewhere deep inside telling me “it is worth to have meaning of every single breath”, also there was a sense of “Trust” that “in every incident there is an opportunity to learn as well as to grow”, and all that because the “Meaning” I want to get out of my life.
At the beginning of “Coaching” journey, “Silence” was my sanctuary where I retreat to observe and reflect. By doing this eventually “Intuition” developed to be part of my coaching practice and my character.
“Coaching” became the cleansing journey of old norms, ideas and thoughts! As Charles Bukowski said “This could mean losing girlfriends, wives, relatives, jobs and maybe even your mind.”, and that’s exactly what happened with me, when I realized I was doing harm to everyone including myself, then I released my family from the pain and started my own journey of knowing who I am! and I’m still in that Journey till now!
It is a journey of serving a “Bigger Purpose”, serving Human fellow to find their own “Meaning” of their lives on this earth.”
We could relate to Mazen and found his philosophy incredibly encouraging, so we interviewed him to discover more.
How has coaching changed your life, specifically in how you think, feel and act?
Being a human, whose actions are driven by his emotions/feelings, and with preferences towards inner self (Introvert), therefore I would start with highlighting that Coaching has played major role in sharpening, strengthening and solidifying those inner feelings and emotions. Coaching helped me to embrace them, understand them and validate as much as possible but not judge them or underestimate them.
For example, when I used to experience tensed feelings, I used to be not confident if my feelings are true or honest, moreover there is strong doubt if my message is clear and will be understood or not!
That eventually led me to live in silence and be silent, and in addition to that I kept things inside burning me out without sharing them with those around me! With Coaching, I started putting those feelings and emotions in words and spreading them on papers, then I’ve challenged myself to publish them and surprisingly people have related to my words and one of the comments I’ve received “Your words are simple and you expressed those feelings I failed/couldn’t say or tell”.
In regard of “Thinking & Acting”, Coaching helped me in not taking things for granted and to realize that things are subject to change. A new muscle became part of me, and that is “Curiosity”, which was new to me. Practicing this muscle helped and is still helping me discover new feelings and get more grounded in them, as well as encountering new things that, at some point of time, I thought didn’t exist.
I’ve realized that I became “Accepting” things without judging them and take what suits me for that particular phase of time and incident, moreover, looking for new things that make me grow.
In what ways have you used coaching to have a positive impact on other people’s lives?
“Coaching” enlightened many sides of myself and helped me to know who I am, moreover it helped me to know what drives me and keeps me moving towards things I want to achieve.
This made me not to limit the core of “Coaching” principles to be only applied in certain context or relationships.
In other words, it became part of my DNA as the way I ask questions lead them to “Reflect”. The purpose became meaningful and constructive conversation that led to grow, to reflect, and to gain.
What impact has that been?
When I asked those who are around me, whether family or in coaching relationship, for their feedback on how I’m impactful with them; and most of the feedback received around;
- Giving them the space to express their thought without judgement
- Supporting them to know themselves better (Own voice)
- Making them feel that they are worthy, resourceful(Trust)
- Making them feel that they have been heard and seen(Active Listening)
- Challenge them, to let them believe in who they are and what capable of.
- Making them feel safe while they are in the process of knowing thier limitation and accept it.
What have you achieved that you would never have been able to do without coaching?
In 2015 and during a Fundamental course with CTI, I was shocked when I received a question about “What is your life Purpose?”, and I couldn’t understand nor was I able to answer it. Then another blowing question hit me “What are your values?”
Being at the age of 42 and unable to know if there is a purpose behind my existence in this life, for me it was Scary and rang a bill! “Am I living the life I should live?”, “is it my life that I’m living now?”
If I’m to summarize what I’ve achieved with coaching, then it would be the followings;
- Knowing my Values
- Knowing my Life Purpose
- Believe there is Hope and not to give up
- Not to sweat over small things
- Keep searching for new starts
- Be Curious, which open new and fresh opportunities
- Be Open to possibilities
- Embrace and accept my faults and learn from them
- Honor my limits and enjoy the now
- Go with the flow and create from the moment
- Pay attention to things around me
- Perfectionism is another form of slavery of mind and limiting belief.
- Letting go unnecessary worries it is one of way of healing myself.
When you imagine your future career, what role does coaching play in you achieving your dreams?
If Coaching’s principles became in someone’s DNA, then it would be always present in every second of his life.
My faith in Coaching let me not to consider it as tool or a framework, but as a “Drive” that helps me in walking paths and be somehow satisfied, because of taking “Charge” of my own life.
Coaching opened my eyes on that there are “Possibilities” regardless of how tough the situation would be, and with this I still be happy to certain extend with whatever has been achieved.
It is not about position or wealth, however it is about how much I am Satisfied with things I wished to achieved and I believe my dreams no matter how big or small they are, they will be achieved since I’m spiritually, mentally and physically being prepared. Coaching has helped me to reach that level in understanding that it is all about me and about how I want it to be.
I’m clear in my vision, that I want a simple, fulfilling, and enjoyable life to live.
What advice would you give your younger, pre-coaching, self?
“Trust” that everything happen for a reason, and be “Grateful” to;
- Every “experience” you went through whether you chose it or you were forced to go through it, and have the “Confidence” that such experience was needed for that “particular phase” of your journey in this life.
- The “Inner” force (inside you) didn’t rest and kept searching, fightingand not settling till it achieves some satisfaction and mere fulfilment (The Ultimate Fulfilment is not a fixed one and it is like a running ocean –Endless-).
- Your “Beliefs” that always exists inside you and derived/urged/pushed you throughout your journey, based on faith that there is something bigger out there that gives meaning to your existence.
What advice would you give someone who had never experienced coaching?
Coaching is nothing but a journey to help you to “Know your life while you have it”, that will eventually enable you to find “Meaning” in every single breath, in every single move and in every single action.
Through Coaching you are not “Fixing” yourself, but you are marching towards “Knowing & Accepting” who you are, working for “Embracing & Growing” yourself.
The more you know yourself, the more light you will bring inside you and to those around you.
In such Journey, you will get closer to live “fulfilled” life powered with a “Life Purpose” and “Serving” bigger purpose.